But enough about obstacles. I have told you what the major obstacles are, but I now need you to discover the rest on your own. The thing is, I really don’t want to tell you anything at all, my only purpose in writing this work is to have it act as a guide, not to act as a “How to Change” manual. I want it to be more of a “This is My Experience” work that you might be able to use to help you through the changes you are about to go through. This is definitely NOT a Bible for Change.
You can lead a horse to water, but you cannot make him or her drink!
Probably at some point in your life you have heard the above adage or saying, or one similar to it. I want to take this moment to remind you, no one led you to this work (unless someone connected to you in some way suggested you come, but that certainly was not me), you basically led yourself here. But even so, however you got here, no one, including me, can make you read what is here, or force you to use anything you read here. This change, if you decide to go through with it, is wholly up to you, and how that change happens for you is completely and absolutely up to you.
Just a short while back I suggested authority figures will be an obstacle against making this change. I even suggested to you that God, being the Ultimate Authority Figure, would be an obstacle. Now I need to change that statement. Since you are still reading this, and didn’t stop reading it when I wrote the above piece on obstacles, I know now that you are serious about making a change, or at least seriously contemplating making a change. So, if you believe in God, and find that after you make the change you still believe in God, I’m not going to tell you that you are wrong. I may not have said this in so many words before this, but as you go through this change, you may find you believe things inside yourself that did not originate inside you. That does not mean they are wrong. Some people actually know what they are talking about. And here is the point I tell you that while the concept of God, or any supreme being or force, does not work for me, it is up to you to decide what does or doesn’t work for you. Only you can know what works for you. No one, absolutely no one, has the right to tell you that you are wrong about anything.
Somewhere in the course of reading this work, you probably also asked yourself, “If this change is so hard to make, and so potentially life-changing, why should I bother trying to make it? Do not let me answer that for you. My opinion is that if you (the horse) are here (at the water), and looking for help (wanting to quench your thirst), why not drink? That is the simple response, but does it help you decide to drink? I hope it isn’t that simple for you, although if you are ready it might be. But if you still aren’t sure, what is it that you might decide to not make the change that keeps you from doing it? First question: Is the water safe to drink, and am I being truthful when I say I believe it is? My response is: I have absolutely no vested interest in what you decide to do. I am not asking you for money, so I don’t want to steal from you. I am not asking you to become a follower, a cult member, or anything like that, so I don’t want to force you into anything. I am not asking you to do anything at all that you don’t decide to do on your own. In fact, I really only want to help you do this if you decide to do this for yourself. There is no should here, or no must. This is totally up to you. And to take that idea one step farther, I don’t want to tell you or anyone why to change or what to change into. My only role in this whole process, if you will allow me to change the allegory, is to be the midwife as you give birth to the new you. There is nothing else I can or want to do. On the off chance that there is a second question, I would prefer you ask it either in a comment, or directly to me (firstname.lastname@example.org) if you prefer privacy.
Here, I think, is a good time to back up a little in this work. Another question you are probably asking in some shape or form is: What has all this to do with all living beings? Everything I have said so far pertains to human beings, to people, and no one can read this but people. And you have hit the nail directly on the head with a huge hammer. I mentioned above that there are trillions of billions of millions of living beings on this planet alone, what about them? Most of them can’t think, or read, or write, or even know. They aren’t even aware they are alive… Are they?
Have you ever asked an ant if it is aware of its own existence? Absurd. There is no way for an amoeba to know it is alive. Or even a _______? I’ll let you fill in the blank. I am not going to insult your intelligence by saying I talk with bugs, or plants, or most animals. But neither am I going to insult their intelligence, or whatever it is that they use to direct their daily lives. I have no illusion that I am a member of the most intelligent species of beings in existence. Because I do not know how to communicate with a living being does not mean it does not communicate with itself, or others of its kind. My basis for this belief is a simple one, all of us are alive. All of us share this wondrous thing called life. And there is no reason for me to believe I am special, or people are special. Or to put that another way, I believe every living being is special, because every living being has life.
If I had my druthers, I would have called this philosophy A Philosophy of Life, but that name is already taken. I wracked my brain to come up with a name that could describe what I feel inside of me, and communicate that feeling to you, or anyone else capable of using this method of communication. Nothing fit, until one day I woke up with the name on the tip of my lips, A Philosophy for All Living Beings. Where it came from, I cannot tell you. I assume it came from my dream mind, or my subconcious mind, or maybe my unsane mind, but it really doesn’t matter where it came from. It works for me, and as far as I know, no one has ever used it before.
So, to quickly describe why I think this philosophy works for all living beings, it is because most living beings already know who they are, and how to live their lives. It might not seem thus to us, but we have no way of knowing what being a different species of life feels like to that particular species of life, or that any being within any species feels about being a living being. I wrote a verse of poetry one day, which seems to be very appropriate here. In the about to be quoted verse, I was writing about dinosaurs:
their brains were the size of peas
we are told
but the size of the brain
does not reflect
the expanse of the mind
(The entire poem can be read at http://rawgod.tripod.com/RealAdvice/id3.htm if you are interested.)
This also refers to humans. No one knows what we are truly capable of. But for this work, I would like to re-write that sentence as: No one knows what you are truly capable of… At least, not yet…
To be continued…
Reality on Earth is many things, and is not always the same for all people as one would think it would have to be if there were nothing beyond reality. Axiomatically, there had to be something beyond, or at least different from, reality.
That thought was the first clue I had to realizing that there might be something different from what I was being told reality was. So I started to look at what other people saw as reality, and quickly found out there seem to be as many different versions of reality as there are people trying to describe it. Did that mean there was no reality? Surely, there must be, said my young mind. After all, we were all alive, living on the same world, so there must be some kind of reality. And, well, the more I thought about it, and the more I learned about the search for reality, the more I came to understand that what most people called reality was what the strongest and most powerful people called reality, but no matter how strong they were, no matter how powerful they were, there was always someone else who had a different version of reality, or, more appropriately, they had a different vision of reality. In the end, what people were seeing, and trying to describe, were their own visions of what they called reality.
But I am getting off topic, so please forgive me. I was asking what kind of person, what kind of living being, could be so egotistical as to think he or she could speak for all living beings. Well, I never thought that would be me, because all I really wanted to do was find a philosophy that spoke for me, and to me. And I looked, hard. And I found some that did speak to me, but they always had things about them that I disagreed with, some piece of an invisible puzzle that was always missing. At first I did not think I was asking too much, but the more I looked, the deeper I searched, the more I realized no one could offer me something that I could even live with, let alone take to be my own. No one could describe for me what I was experiencing as reality. And that scared me…
But it also inspired me. I began to search farther afield, looking behind stones and under rocks, inside shadows, and through misty veils. I looked everywhere I could think to look, and then places I happened to encounter when I wasn’t looking. Until one day, I looked inside me…
And a whole new world opened itself to me. No, not a world, but a universe… A beautiful universe… An exotic universe… An unbelievable universe… A universe that scared the shit out of me!
So, please allow me to fast forward past a whole huge part of my life, and get to the main tenets of the philosophy that I see as working for all living beings, which is why you are reading this work in the first place, isn’t it:
To know who you are
Learn who you are,
So you can become who you are,
Which will allow you to be who you are,
And, in the end, you get to just
The rewards for doing this are peace of body, peace of mind, peace of spirit.
Looks simple, sounds simple, is simple… Once you get to the last line, the Be. The early parts — the hardest things a thinking being can or will ever do. And there are many reasons for that, reasons which I will call obstacles, because that is what they are. And there are more of them than anyone might ever think (I will try to keep these obstacles in some semblance of order, from most difficult to less difficult, but that order is my order, so don’t take it to heart. Your order will most likely be completely different. But no matter, because forewarned is forearmed.):
- You. You are addicted to being who you are right now. Harsh words, but truer than you can presently imagine. Right now, as you read this, you think you want to change. But is this what you truly want? Whether you are young, old, or anywhere in-between, you are more than used to being you, because you have been you for your whole life up to this point, and you really don’t know how to be anyone else. A purist might not call you, or even themself, addicted, but I will, because it makes it even more important to change. Addictions are generally not good things.
- The people who love you. Probably, you have never thought of the people who love you as obstacles to becoming who you really are, but I found them to be exactly that. Why? Because they love you just the way you are. They know you just the way you are. And if you change, you will stop being the person they know you are. Yup, they think they know you, but do they really? Do they know you are not happy with who you are? Why else are you reading this? You are not happy with who you are, so you want to change. The people who love you will try to stop you from changing, even if they think they are supporting you. You are known to them. If you change, you will become unknown. And that is a scary thing.
- Authority figures. Let’s start right at the top, the biggest authority figure of all. God. Probably, you are a believer, maybe not. Doesn’t matter. Unless you are Absolutely Atheist, God is not only all around you, but always affecting you in some way. The believers around you want to bring you into their flock, particularly the Hebrew-based faiths — Christianity and Islam. It scares them (you?) to know other people reject their faith. If God is all-powerful, why does He allow people to not believe, or believe differently? (Such people tell me it is God’s plan to not have everyone believe, those who don’t believe are not worthy, and that is what makes the believers feel special! And if that works for you, good, I applaud you. But you are reading this work that I am writing. Does that not mean you are missing something from your life? Or, to change the question, is there too much of something in your life? Is there too much of Him, or them, or anything? Or would you just like to have more of you?) As for other, lesser authority figures, they may not be as All-Powerful or Omni-Present as God, but still they (preachers, teachers, professors, bosses, family, friends, doctors, psychologists, psychiatrists, even strangers like TV or movie personalities, ad-men and ad-women, etc. ad infinitum) surround you almost as completely, and their effects are just as hard to overcome. They all want you to stay who you already are, because different is dangerous.
- Government. Yes, another group of authority figures, but on a completely different order or level. People who want to tell others what to do believe two basic things: you are not smart enough to govern yourself, which means that others are not smart enough to govern themselves either, and, they (the politicians) are smart enough to govern you, because they know how to run things — they know how everyone else should be and act. If you are reading this, you already know two things, you are smart enough to know how to govern yourself, and therefore others are smart enough to govern themselves too, and, the people who want to govern you don’t know any better than you do (they just think they do), and they also have ulterior motives that make them want to govern you, so you won’t notice how they are screwing you. They are, you know, screwing you, even if you can’t see how they are doing it. (No, I do not believe in government, that is easy enough to see. But I used to, because it was always there, always telling me what to do, always telling others around me what to do, and meanwhile always doing what it was telling everyone else not to do. But having said that, please don’t believe me. Find out for yourself.)
- Gold (Money, and the idea of money). How can money be an obstacle to change, you are thinking? Money is what makes it possible to change… If you decide you still want to change, to become yourself, you will discover for yourself money is what makes things impossible to get, no matter how much of it you might want, or have. Let me ask you, what do you use money for? The first thing you use money for are the basics, food and shelter. Once you have those things, you move on to others, such as clothes, more food, better shelter, and things that make you happy. Isn’t that what life is all about: happiness? And what makes you happy? Love? Friendship? Stability? The ability to purchase… Stop! Money doesn’t buy love! Money doesn’t buy friendship! Money doesn’t buy stability… well, maybe it provides stability, but does it actually buy it? In today’s world, can you have stability without money? I’ll let you think about that, and a lot of other things too. Including this question, what can you do without money?
To be continued..
Reality on Earth is many things, and is not always the same for all people as one would think it would have to be if there was nothing beyond reality.
Can there be such a thing, a philosophy for all living beings? I mean, come on now, from amoebas and viruses and bacteria to humans and elephants and whales, and who knows what kinds of living beings might exist on other worlds, or other planes of existence, can any one person speak for every other living being? That would be impossible, wouldn’t it? And incredibly egotistical! What could possess a person, any person, to make such a claim? He or she would have to be insane, right? Just trying to think of the immensity of the numbers of living beings here on Earth, the trillions of billions of millions of living beings alive right now is beyond human comprehension, and if you throw in the beings that might be alive on even one other planet somewhere in the universe, that would be doubly impossible to comprehend, so, yeah, insane is a good word that comes immediately to mind. But I, the person trying to write this insane philosophy, have a different word to describe how I feel making such a claim, and that word is unsane, or, beyond sanity.
Sanity is a condition of life that locks us inside a universal (or should I say, at this time, planet-wide?) shared concept of what reality is. Insanity, in its turn, appears to mean something like unable to live in that shared reality sane people exist in. But unsanity, as I use it, means able to go beyond the shared planet-wide concept of reality without losing that concept of reality. “I feel like I am unsane because I can see through the veil of reality while still being able to live in that shared reality without making other people think I am insane, or unable to cope with that reality in some way. As I see myself, and the reality around me, I am not locked into that reality, but able to transcend it whenever I see or feel the need. Therefore I am more than sane, I am unsane.”
[So, if you can live with that definition, whether or not you can fully understand it, or even accept it, we can move on from here. Otherwise, I think anyone who cannot live with my definition of unsanity will think me insane, and therefore find little value in the philosophy of all living beings, because it probably will not fit into their (or your) vision of sanity, and the reality in which they (you) live.]
To continue, I did not start out to discover a philosophy for all living beings, because to even have had that concept before I stumbled onto it would have been insane, even to me. All I was looking for was something I could live with, a thought or idea or maybe even a purpose about my life, or for my life. You might say I was adrift in a sea of concepts all handed down to me from the people who I thought understood the world into which I had been born. Yes, I believed what I was told, for maybe the first 10 years of my life.
I cannot say exactly what started me thinking that the authorities on life didn’t have any better clue of what life was all about than I did, but probably it was knocked into me by a physically abusive father who was determined to knock all my weird ideas out of me. He, nor anyone else, was able to answer the questions I was starting to ask, so he somehow decided that he could beat me into sanity, which was actually the worst thing anyone could have done. Instead of beating reality into me, he made me want another reality all the more, a reality where I was safe from being beaten… (I gave myself that safe reality as a 16th birthday present. I had run away from home in an attempt to find safety before that day, but this was an era when there was no legal policy to stop a parent from abusing a child, so the police always took me back to my father despite me telling them he was probably going to beat me to death one day. You can guess what this made me think of the police force, but that is another matter. There was, however, one cop who told me one day, wait till you are 16 and you can legally escape from him, and my mantra (a verbal statement that inspires its speaker) became “Only xxx more days till freedom,” and I counted down the days till I turned 16.) None of this, of course, is important to this work, but I thought you might like to know how my life started, and how I became so determined to find something that was different from the insane reality that was destroying me.
Reality on Earth is many things, and is not always the same for all people as one would think it would have to be if there was nothing beyond reality.
That thought was the first clue I had to realizing that there might be something different from what I was being told reality was. So this is where I really started my search…
To be continued…
I am going to start by saying I do hope my vision of spirituality matters to someone besides me, but not in the way that might sound at first read. By the end of this post you will hear me say it absolutely does not matter if my vision of spirituality matters to anyone else, so I hope I can make clear what it is I am trying to say. First, I am not talking about my exact vision of spirituality, that is pretty specialized to my own experience and understanding, but what I am talking about is the principle underlying that vision, the general outline of what it is I believe…
I was brought up to believe in christ, nation, and money, but none of that ever really sat right in my gut, my heart, or my mind. It took a little time, a nudge from a stranger or two, and a couple of spiritual crises, but I finally realized what was so problematic for me: “nothing of what I believed came from inside of me.” None of it! Everything came from outside of me–all the authority figures in my early life told me what to believe, and that bothered me. It may not bother anyone else, but I was a bit of a loner when it came to what really mattered in life, in my life. I purposely started questioning everything I had been told to believe, to see if it agreed with what I was feeling inside of me, and what I was experiencing in my life. I’ve said it all in other places, other blogs, other websites, so I’m not going to go into it here, but for anyone interested you’ll probably find the basis for most of my beliefs at LiveReal.com. It’s actually been a while since I was very active on that site, so please don’t take anything as written in stone, but that is where I wrote down what I was finding inside me some twenty years ago. The man I am now can definitely be seen in the person writing on LiveReal.
But I guess what I am really trying to say, if you are unsatisfied with your present belief system, no matter what it is, try doing as I did. Question absolutely everything! And then look inside yourself to learn how to replace whatever it is you decided to throw away. Or just throw it away and not replace any of it, if that is what your gut tells you to do. Certainly please do not replace it with anything anyone else has said, especially me. But whatever you decide, please look for “your” answers inside “yourself.” Who else can you trust to be honest with you, if not your self. Inside myself is where I found my vision of spirituality. And I did not even know I was looking for it. Yeah, I knew I was looking for something, but I had no inkling it would take me so far away from where I had begun. And that is why my spirituality means so much to me now, why no belief system from outside me can ever take hold of my mind again. This is me. What I write is me. And the possibility it comes quite close to beliefs other people hold actually has no effect on me. I’m not looking to find strength in numbers. Those people I encounter who believe similarly to me are important as friends, indeed, but I do not need anyone to reinforce my belief system for me.
So, going back to that belief system, the vision I have of spirituality, does it really matter if it doesn’t matter to anyone else? The answer is a harsh answer, “No!”, but I cannot apologize for that. Reality for me is, what I believe is what “I” believe, the inner me, the essence of me–dare I say it, the spirit that is me. I cannot believe for anyone else, that is their (your) task or purpose in life. Even if you believe in nothing at all, that is your choice. But here the waters get muddied, because it is me wanting you to have your own beliefs. When I say, “Believe what you find in your own spirit, your essence, your inner “you!” am I not telling you what I think you should do? I am, but please believe me, I do it with the greatest concern for you, the real you. Why do I do this? Because I want you to discover what is best for you, not what is best for me–or anyone else…
There are times I look at the world around me, and what I see are people who seem to have been brainwashed to believe they cannot think for themselves, that they are not smart enough to have their own understanding of life and any purpose life might have. Then I look at myself, and I see what I have accomplished in my life, and I think, I’m not special compared to anyone else, so if I can do this, why can’t everyone else? Yes, I got a couple of unexpected nudges along the way, nudges that I did not understand would mean learning to believe in myself, but that ultimately came to mean exactly that. So, please do not consider what I say to be a directive, or command, but simply a friendly nudge. And, well, maybe a whole lot of inspiration… If rawgod could do that, so can I, meaning you. And if it helps, know that I believe you can discover your own truth for itself… For “YOURSELF,” and for your “SELF!” Above all, don’t let anyone else, including me, say to you, “You are wrong.” How can anyone be wrong, as long as their truth, your truth, is theirs, or yours, just like my truth is MINE!
And that is why the harsh answer, “No!”, is the only answer I can give to my own question, Does it really matter if my vision of spirituality matters to anyone else? That negative answer is the most positive, life-affirming, YOU-affirming answer I know how to give. I can only hope you take it as I intend it…
Death is a portal, a very important one. I happen to believe in reincarnation, not because anyone told me to believe in reincarnation, but because it makes more “spiritual” sense than does not believing in it. Everything I, who started out life as a christian, have ever experienced points towards the reality of reincarnation, and the evolution of the spirit through a series of incarnations. So when I say “death” is a very important portal into another dimension of existence, I am speaking what I see as a universal truth, with myself as my universe. And why is death so important? Death is important because it usually leads to yet another birth, and a new period of learning.
How I went from being a christian to being a firm believer in reincarnation I have told in previous blogs, so I will not tell the whole story here. But two experiences that were so similar as to be two sides of the same coin, or two consecutive cars in a train of cars, I will never forget. The first experience, I went through a wormhole that took me to the place dead spirits go. About ten days or so later I went through another wormhole, and ended up in the exact same place. This spoke to my “scientific mind” because I proved that the process was repeatable–once is an anomaly, twice is proof. Therefore, on the face of it, the place of dead spirits does exist, and the peculiar thing about this place is that it is the very same place from which come the spirits of the about-to-be-born. It is simultaneously a repository of life and a fountain of life. You cannot have one without the other.
One important lesson I took from those visits was that being prepared for death can make a difference in what happens next. Time does not exist on this plane, not as we know it here on Earth, but nor do things happen instantaneously either. If one is not prepared for their death, what I call the crossing of the “veil of death” for want of a better descriptor, there is still the need to heal before the veil is recrossed in the opposite direction. When we die, we actually go back to the same place we were before we were last born. And how we lived our last life CAN AND WILL EFFECT how we will live our next life.
All I am really saying is reincarnation starts and stops in the same non-place as long as you remain involved in human time/space. I should know, I (that is my spiritual-I, not my ego-I) have been resident here in this dimension for some 3 billion years or so. And when I started here, lifetimes lasted a few seconds at most. I’d really hate to have to count how many incarnations I have gone through in those 3 billion years. I say this not to brag, but only to show I have some experience at this thing we call life, in the process we call death, and I am getting to the point I am bringing the learning from past lives with me into the present life. However, while I am here, even with that learning, I am still mostly cut off from that place that was/will be. Under “historic circumstances,” life on the spiritual plane stays separate from life here on the “physical plane.” Until this incarnation I never knew while here that there even was a spiritual plane that acted as my base for the time between lives. The pain of birth, when we are born, is generated partly by the physical separation of baby from mother, but even moreso from the separation of physicality from spirituality. Oh, we are still spiritual beings, and can sense spiritual feelings, but we generally cannot experience true spirituality as long as we are alive on the physical plane. Unless we can discover a wormhole, or other such connector between physical life and true spiritual life, we live in the country of the blind.
My friend, Sha’Tara, recently said something very important to me, “Death isn’t a state, it’s an event, a passage, a transition. By using out-of-body techniques we can learn to experience death[-like experiences] until it becomes something you’re good at and ready to do. A bit like driver training. Eventually you get your license and you’re on the wide open road again… The physical pain, the stoppage of breath, the necessary sudden detachments, these can be problematical for those inexperienced in death. Ask a passenger in coach to take over the controls of a Boeing 727 who’s never been in a pilot seat before, that’s death without proper preparation. To die properly and with dignity requires training. Contemplation of death, seems to me, is a vital exercise to accompany one’s life. Like remembering, or knowing, where the exits are and where one left the car while watching the movie.”
It is possible to prepare for death. Sha’Tara has given her method above. My method is quite different, but both methods end up in the same place. For myself, I asked this question,”Who do I want to be when my time comes to depart this world? I was 19 the first time I asked myself this question, and I’m not really sure why I asked it at that time. At 19 one feels immortal, and the concept of death is something for old folks, not for someone with their whole life ahead of them. But once I thought about it, I could not unthink it. At the time I was going through my “rethinking religion” phase, not yet an agnostic but moving in that direction. I still believed there was a “god,” and that I had to please that god in order to avoid an eternity of damnation. I just did not believe in a “christian god” anymore–to think that a god could favour one group of people over another did not make sense to me. It went against everything I was told a god should be. And I think it was at this time I also rejected the idea of having “one lifetime” to either succeed or fail; everything I saw around me said that no one could succeed in just one lifetime, my world, if not the world itself, was full of religious hypocrites. No one I met, including preachers or Sunday school teachers, was going to heaven based on what I saw them doing. Other people seemed to selectively ignore certain ideas and actions, but my mind was still absolute, my thinking black and white. What I saw was sin committed after sin committed after sin, everywhere I looked. And this was the person, me, who wanted to know, “What would it take to be truly prepared for death?.”
I started reading everything I could get my hands on, which wasn’t much in the days before the internet. Religions, philosophies, way-out ideas, and ultra-conservative ideas. But the more I read, the more confused I became. Different writers were all trying to say something, but it seemed every writer contradicted at least one other writer on at least one important idea. Nobody could agree with everyone else on almost anything. That was when I learned, the only person I could rely upon for answers was myself. Some people call it soul-searching, other people call it meditation, I personally just called it deep-thinking, going down to levels I did not even know existed. And eventually I got to the level of what I can only call “wormholes,” which were a science fiction invention by which space travellers can go from one place in space to another place in space without having to travel the actual distance between the two places. So, inside my own head, inside my own mind, I discovered a wormhole, and as I told you above, I travelled to a place where generally only dead spirits can go.
Now, here I need to try to describe what is not describable in Earthly language, certainly not in English, which is my Mother tongue. There were not any “spirits” hanging around shooting pool or playing pin-the-tail-on-the-donkey. There was only one spirit, and that spirit contained all other spirits that were not living in the 3rd dimension at that time. Some had just arrived by crossing the veil of death away from the universe, and others were preparing to cross back into the universe. And there were others, ones who had returned to this place in various states of damage. These damaged spirits were being coddled by the others who were about to be born, and those who had returned here undamaged. The largest number of spirits, though, were the damaged. And they could not go anywhere until they were healed, or so it seemed to me at that time.
There were other things about this level of existence that set it apart from all others, things that were mentioned in myths so ancient as to make me doubt my sanity, or that made me think that people were once more connected to this place then than they are now. The “Music of the Spheres,” for one thing. I am not a fan of classical music, it bores me to tears. But in this place, the music sounded classical, yet it brought tears of joy to my spiritual eyes. The colours, and the patterns in the colours, were more than I could stand to hear. I was touching something like electricity, but as a healing force, not a harmful one. My spirit was inundated with beauty beyond concept, and suddenly I was travelling back down the wormhole to my body’s mind.
I cannot describe the feeling of coming back to my body. The relief that I was not dead. The opportunity to still be alive. The loss of the feeling of community with all life. The loss of beauty beyond measure. The knowledge that there is more life in death than in all the life that can be lived before death. I was just so overwhelmed by feelings beyond my capacity to feel, by truths beyond my capacity to know or understand, by the feeling to return where I had been, because that was where the “real I” was, and the “I” I was on Earth was so much less than the “I” I could be in death. Was I wrong to want to come back? Or was I wrong to want to go back?
In the end, when my body and mind had recovered enough, I searched for another wormhole, and hoped it would take me back to where I had been. Why? For a million reasons, of course, but mainly to make sure it was really there. What a disappointment it would be if that place was a construct to entertain my mind! What a tragedy! But I was lucky, because I did return there. And I was unlucky, because I experienced the admonition that I was not there by crossing the veil of death, but by circumventing it. I was somehow dead without dying, and I could be dead, if I so chose, or I could be alive again, but I could never return there until my body died. As is obvious from the fact you are reading these words, I chose life right now, as opposed to a future life in death. And I believe I made the most positive choice for my spirit, because I don’t think I could ever have forgiven myself for leaving a living body behind me, without me to inhabit it. Sir Walter Scott thought lying created a tangled web, but try dying without being dead. I managed to live a surface life for many years after that, but inside my mind was utter turmoil. Nothing made sense. Reality was something I could only dream about.
Yet slowly, slowly, as I began to put it all together, it started to make sense. For years the visions nagged at my mind till finally dots started to be connected that originally had no relation of any kind to each other. I began to understand what I had seen and heard, and what I had sensed in the short periods of adaptation to a timeless continuum. And out of this arose the list of things I realized I needed to do to be able to be ready to die, in the order of how I am writing about them, there is no requirement that is more important than any other:
- Relinquish all attachments to this world, no matter what they are
- Relinquish all attachments to my body and ego
- To realize that my only duty is to life, in all its varieties and levels of being
- No ties to the physical world can or will survive death. The only thing that exists on the plane of dead beings is the spirit that contains all the spirits of the “dead” beings. I cannot even guess how this works, because the mind itself only exists in this dimension. Beyond this dimension is only spirit. The more a being is attached to, the more that being needs to heal from those attachments.
- I have lived with my body since my birth, and with my ego since shortly thereafter. The longer a person’s life, generally speaking, the stronger the ties to body and ego. However, that said, to progress as a spiritual being is to weaken those ties to body and ego. The buddha said this very thing while contemplating the path to nirvana, but there is no nirvana, or heaven, or firdaus (jannah). There is only life, living, or “dead.”
- Duty, undefined, is something that some, possibly most, humans can perceive as real, though there is no reality where duty is more than a concept. I have never felt a duty to anything such as some people do, but of late I have begun to feel a duty to life in many ways that I could never have imagined before. Having taken total responsibility for my own life has given me a duty to be responsible for all life. But when it comes right down to it, IF I have a duty, the only REAL DUTY I have is to my spirit, which translates to a duty to the spirits of all living beings, which translates to a duty to the spirit of life itself. And since that duty will now follow me wherever I go, it is not really a duty at all. That duty is me, the spiritual me, and that duty is the spirit that we commonly call spirituality. So as long as my spirit lives, as long as my spirit has life, wherever I am, I cannot be other than my spirit, nor other than life itself.
If I can do these things, and probably more besides that I cannot think of right now, then I can properly die, cross the veil of death, and reawaken as a whole spirit on the spiritual side of life. So these are the things I aim for without aiming, and strive for without striving. Probably this sounds like goobledygook to you, but I assure you I am not trying to be flippant. To aim or to strive is to attach oneself to the goal at the end of striving. In order to succeed, one can only seek to find…
THE ART OF DYING, as written by George Harrison
There’ll come a time when all of us must leave here
Then nothing sister Mary can do
Will keep me here with you
As nothing in this life that I’ve been trying
Could equal or surpass the art of dying
Do you believe me?
There’ll come a time when all your hopes are fading
When things that seemed so very plain
Become an awful pain
Searching for the truth among the lying
And answered when you’ve learned the art of dying
But you’re still with me
But if you want it
Then you must find it
But when you have it
There’ll be no need for it
There’ll come a time when most of us return here
Brought back by our desire to be
A perfect entity
Living through a million years of crying
Until you’ve realized the Art of Dying
Do you believe me?
George Harrison – Art Of Dying Lyrics | MetroLyrics
To all my dear readers, HAPPY NEW YEAR! May 2018 bring you all surprises to ease your troubled minds.
As you know, I have been struggling with trying to give a definitive definition of what I mean when I write about Spirituality. I’ve talked about what it is not, I’ve tried to say what it is, I looked at related things, and now, after quite some time, I think I have finally found the words that can speak for me. My concern is, while they speak for me, will they speak TO YOU?
I could approach this definition two ways, by trying to set the stage to lead you by the nose, or just open the curtains, give the soliloquy, add some editorial material, and wait to hear the questions or concerns you might have. So, hear goes. Curtains up, don’t light the lights. Just me, lounging at a desk, feet up on the desk, holding a microphone as a soft soft light shines down on me, slowly intensifying, but never getting bright. I am just one of the crowd. And I want to be able to look out into the audience…
Good evening, friends. Tonight I’m here to speak about SPIRITUALITY. No ghosts, no wandering spirits, no voodoo, not even a Great Bear to the North. Those things are not germane to what I want to talk about. But before I start, I want you to look around you. As you can see, the seats are nowhere close to even half full, so let’s not care about what seats you paid for, please get up and move as close as you are comfortable being to the stage, and to each other. All that physical reality bullshit is not why we are here. We are here to be together, to be a community. Now that you are settled, introduce yourself to those seat neighbours you don’t already know. Be friendly, tell a white joke or two, smile at someone, ask for or give a hug if you feel like it. Because this is what I call spirituality. We are together, we are sharing an evening, and we have no animosity to each other. The only thing we are missing is our coffins. (nervous laughter ripples across the audience)
You see, true spirituality happens after death, when your ego dies and your freed spirit returns to its pre-birth home. As it travels along what the Tibetan Buddhists call the Silver Cord, the tunnel of energy that connects you to your real being, you look over your whole life, important events, unimportant events, people you forgot you ever knew, places you’ve forgotten you’ve ever been. And things, all kings of things, you cannot remember ever doing, some of them uplifting, some of them outright degrading. But you stay quite unemotional, because it is like you are watching the movie of your life. And that is exactly what you are doing. Every little detail of it, good, bad, and indifferent.
Spirituality as I use the term is the realm of being where living spirits come together to reconnect, yes, reconnect, with other spirits and even themselves. They have been alone so long, while they lived on the physical plane, and on that physical plane they felt little connection to anyone, not real connection. The spirit, shall we say, on Earth (since that is where we are right now), is born alone, lives alone, and dies alone. Think about it, YOU are alone inside your own head right now. Yes, you are sitting here in tonight’s community, sharing this space, breathing the same air, listening to the same words. You are together, safely together, no one here is going to harm you. But inside your head, no one else is there with you. What are you thinking about while you are listening? Are you concentrating so hard that you are shutting out the rest of the world? Or is your mind wandering off on what you are going to do when you leave here tonight, when you leave this little close-knit community?
Oh, don’t worry, I don’t care what is going on inside your heads. Even if you are daydreaming, or questioning why you came here tonight, that’s up to you. Because I know your inner spirit is listening, and it won’t let you forget the words it heard. Maybe in bed tonight, maybe driving down a long shady lane all by yourself a year from now, maybe on your deathbed, these words will come to you again, to your conscious mind, and you will wonder, and you will agree with me, you really are alone on this Earth. No one knows you like you. No one knows all your secrets. No one knows your regrets. No one knows about the time you spit in some asshole’s drink at the bar because you turned them down and they would not take no for an answer. Maybe you even peed into a drink and poured it into their beer. No one knows those things, no one but you…
And nobody but you cares. Not your neighbour. Not your kids. Not your mother. Not your partner, if you have one. Not even me. Because I don’t know your pains, nor do I know your joys. I hope you had some joys up to this point in your life. No one should have to live without joys. Because that hurts the spirit in ways we can never really understand. But the point of this exercise is to let you know, it’s all right. All of it. Whether you did things like I mentioned, or nothing like that. I am not here to judge you. No one is here to judge you. I hope you aren’t here to judge you. Because life is not about judging. Life is about living, learning, and improving who you believe yourself to be. It’s been that way since the first one-celled being floated in the primeval ocean billions of years ago. And just to bring this all back to spirituality, that first one-celled being in that billion-year old ocean is the most important being in your life, in my life, in the lives of every living being on Earth, because we are all related to that first living one-celled being. And through that being, we are all related to each other.
That is the half of spirituality I had not mentioned before. That is why I used the word reconnecting. When there was only one being, that being was us. That being didn’t know that, we never knew that, but, yes, we were all that being. Quite a big load for that one little microscopic-sized being to carry. But it had no problem carrying us all, because we weren’t alive yet. But we were inherent in its being. Every time it split, or divided (the process called mitosis), it created a new life, and it divided many times before it died. And its children created more lives many times before they died. Until it was only a matter of time till living beings filled up the oceans, and had to expand onto land.
But this is not a history lesson, or a lesson on evolution, it is not even a lesson at all. It is a talk, a one-sided talk to be sure, a soliloquy–but just a talk. It is one living being telling a few other living beings about the world I live in every day that I do not die. And a little bit about what I expect to have happen to me after my death.
So why have I brought you here to listen to me speak about spirituality? Why does the definition of spirituality concern me so much?
I concerns me because the Earth will soon be facing big changes, big challenges. And I want to tell you that, for me, at least, it matters that we all encounter a little bit of my type of spirituality. A feeling of reconnection. The feeling that we are all one. Not just humans, but everything. Our planet, even. Our solar system. Our galaxy. Our universe! And every plane of existence in or out of our universe. We may be small, unimportant beings in a universe full of small unimportant beings, but each and every one of us has the potential to affect all time, space, and beyond, because we are all alive. And because we all have eternal spirits within us. We will die. That is, our egos will cease to exist. Whatever group of molecules and atoms and sub-atomic particles that makes us up will cease to be. But there will be something left, something our scientists cannot find, something our pragmatists will never uncover, something that will remain after we are gone. And all those somethings, those are our spirits, and they are all related, and looking for opportunities to reconnect. And I hope that we here tonight have reconnected to at least a small degree, seen ourselves in each other, and that your spirits have been reminded of what they were before you were born, and what they will be after you are put in those coffins I mentioned at the start of this soliloquy.
But, we do not have to wait until we are put into coffins, or cremated, or however we want our bodies to be dealt with after we die. We can reconnect right now. Open up our minds and join together in a common cause, to make sure that when the opportunity arises, and it will arise, that we continue to evolve, and make our world, our universe, a better place to be than it is right now. I am not trying to make you all see my vision, it works for me, but it may not work for you. But, make a vision of some kind, and work towards it. Help others to want to make their own visions. Visions of hope. Visions of love. Visions of peace. Visions of understanding. Visions of acceptance. Visions of empathy. And above all, visions of compassion.,,
That is my vision of spirituality.
I wish you all a good and spiritual life…