Learning How to Be Unsanely Happy

Reality on Earth is many things, and is not always the same for all people as one would think it would have to be if there were nothing beyond reality. Axiomatically, there had to be something beyond, or at least different from, reality.

That thought was the first clue I had to realizing that there might be something different from what I was being told reality was. So I started to look at what other people saw as reality, and quickly found out there seem to be as many different versions of reality as there are people trying to describe it. Did that mean there was no reality? Surely, there must be, said my young mind. After all, we were all alive, living on the same world, so there must be some kind of reality. And, well, the more I thought about it, and the more I learned about the search for reality, the more I came to understand that what most people called reality was what the strongest and most powerful people called reality, but no matter how strong they were, no matter how powerful they were, there was always someone else who had a different version of reality, or, more appropriately, they had a different vision of reality. In the end, what people were seeing, and trying to describe, were their own visions of what they called reality.

But I am getting off topic, so please forgive me. I was asking what kind of person, what kind of living being, could be so egotistical as to think he or she could speak for all living beings. Well, I never thought that would be me, because all I really wanted to do was find a philosophy that spoke for me, and to me. And I looked, hard. And I found some that did speak to me, but they always had things about them that I disagreed with, some piece of an invisible puzzle that was always missing. At first I did not think I was asking too much, but the more I looked, the deeper I searched, the more I realized no one could offer me something that I could even live with, let alone take to be my own. No one could describe for me what I was experiencing as reality. And that scared me…

But it also inspired me. I began to search farther afield, looking behind stones and under rocks, inside shadows, and through misty veils. I looked everywhere I could think to look, and then places I happened to encounter when I wasn’t looking. Until one day, I looked inside me…

And a whole new world opened itself to me. No, not a world, but a universe… A beautiful universe… An exotic universe… An unbelievable universe… A universe that scared the shit out of me!

So, please allow me to fast forward past a whole huge part of my life, and get to the main tenets of the philosophy that I see as working for all living beings, which is why you are reading this work in the first place, isn’t it:

Know who you are

Learn who you are,

Become who you are,

Be,

The rewards for doing this are peace of body, peace of mind, peace of spirit.

 Looks simple, sounds simple, is simple… Once you get to the last line, the Be. The early parts — the hardest things a thinking being can or will ever do. And there are many reasons for that, reasons which I will call obstacles, because that is what they are. And there are more of them than anyone might ever think (I will try to keep these obstacles in some semblance of order, from most difficult to less difficult, but that order is my order, so don’t take it to heart. Your order will most likely be completely different. But no matter, because forewarned is forearmed.):

  1. You. You are addicted to being who you are right now. Harsh words, but truer than you can presently imagine. Right now, as you read this, you think you want to change. But is this what you truly want? Whether you are young, old, or anywhere in-between, you are more than used to being you, because you have been you for your whole life up to this point, and you really don’t know how to be anyone else. A purist might not call you, or even themself, addicted, but I will, because it makes it even more important to change. Addictions are generally not good things.
  2. The people who love you. Probably, you have never thought of the people who love you as obstacles to becoming who you really are, but I found them to be exactly that. Why? Because they love you just the way you are. They know you just the way you are. And if you change, you will stop being the person they know you are. Yup, they think they know you, but do they really? Do they know you are not happy with who you are? Why else are you reading this? You are not happy with who you are, so you want to change. The people who love you will try to stop you from changing, even if they think they are supporting you. You are known to them. If you change, you will become unknown. And that is a scary thing.
  3. Authority figures. Let’s start right at the top, the biggest authority figure of all. God. Probably, you are a believer, maybe not. Doesn’t matter. Unless you are Absolutely Atheist, God is not only all around you, but always affecting you in some way. The believers around you want to bring you into their flock, particularly the Hebrew-based faiths — Christianity and Islam. It scares them (you?) to know other people reject their faith. If God is all-powerful, why does He allow people to not believe, or believe differently? (Such people tell me it is God’s plan to not have everyone believe, those who don’t believe are not worthy, and that is what makes the believers feel special! And if that works for you, good, I applaud you. But you are reading this work that I am writing. Does that not mean you are missing something from your life? Or, to change the question, is there too much of something in your life? Is there too much of Him, or them, or anything? Or would you just like to have more of you?) As for other, lesser authority figures, they may not be as All-Powerful or Omni-Present as God, but still they (preachers, teachers, professors, bosses, family, friends, doctors, psychologists, psychiatrists, even strangers like TV or movie personalities, ad-men and ad-women, etc. ad infinitum) surround you almost as completely, and their effects are just as hard to overcome. They all want you to stay who you already are, because different is dangerous.
  4. Government. Yes, another group of authority figures, but on a completely different order or level. People who want to tell others what to do believe two basic things: you are not smart enough to govern yourself, which means that others are not smart enough to govern themselves either, and, they (the politicians) are smart enough to govern you, because they know how to run things — they know how everyone else should be and act. If you are reading this, you already know two things, you are smart enough to know how to govern yourself, and therefore others are smart enough to govern themselves too, and, the people who want to govern you don’t know any better than you do (they just say they do), and they also have ulterior motives that make them want to govern you, so you won’t notice how they are screwing you. They are, you know, screwing you, even if you can’t see how they are doing it. (No, I do not believe in government, that is easy enough to see. But I used to, because it was always there, always telling me what to do, always telling others around me what to do, and meanwhile always doing what it was telling everyone else not to do. But having said that, please don’t believe me. Find out for yourself.)
  5. Gold (Money, and the idea of money). How can money be an obstacle to change, you are thinking? Money is what makes it possible to change… If you decide you still want to change, to become yourself, you will discover for yourself money is what makes things impossible to get, no matter how much of it you might want, or have. Let me ask you, what do you use money for? The first thing you use money for are the basics, food and shelter. Once you have those things, you move on to others, such as clothes, more food, better shelter, and things that make you happy. Isn’t that what life is all about: happiness? And what makes you happy? Love? Friendship? Stability? The ability to purchase… Stop! Money doesn’t buy love! Money doesn’t buy friendship! Money doesn’t buy stability… well, maybe it provides stability, but does it actually buy it? In today’s world, can you have stability without money? I’ll let you think about that, and a lot of other things too. Including this question, what can you do without money?

To be continued..

Author: rawgod

A man with a lot of strange experiences in my life. Haven't traveled that much per se, but have lived in a lot of different areas. English is the only language I have mastered, and the older I get, the more of it lose. Seniorhood gives me more time to self-reflect, but since time seems to go much faster, it feels like I don't have as much time for living as my younger selves did. I believe in spiritual atheism and responsible anarchy. These do not have to be oxymorons. Imagination is an incredible tool.

3 thoughts on “Learning How to Be Unsanely Happy”

  1. Quote: “Probably, you have never thought of the people who love you as obstacles to becoming who you really are, but I found them to be exactly that. Why? Because they love you just the way you are. They know you just the way you are. And if you change, you will stop being the person they know you are. Yup, they think they know you, but do they really? Do they know you are not happy with who you are? Why else are you reading this? You are not happy with who you are, so you want to change. The people who love you will try to stop you from changing, even if they think they are supporting you. You are known to them. If you change, you will become unknown. And that is a scary thing.”

    There is truth, indeed. I had a partner once, my first, who said to me after my first big change, “I want a divorce, I don’t know who you are anymore.” And divorce it was. Can’t argue with that, I wasn’t the same person who got married and I was in full process of discovering who that new person was. My train was moving, the other’s was on a siding.

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    1. That’s an excellent way to put it, S’T. When only one person makes a big change in their lives, those around them choose to fall by the wayside. For you it was a relationship/marriage. For me, the first change cost me my childhood friends. My second big change cost me a relationship, and the third, well, I left before I knew what it would cost me. The question is, are those losses positive or negative outcomes? Losing my childhood friends was hard on me, I did not expect them to reject the new me, especially since I didn’t think that change was that big. When the relationship fell apart after the second, big, change I was kind of ready for it, but it was still a loss. When I was in the process of my third change, I saw all the signs I had learned from the first two, and after a brief conversation, I left everything behind and just disappeared. There were negative effects, definitely, but the positives outweighed them by far. As for those left behind, they would have become anchors around my ankles, complete with cement boots. So while losses should be expected, if those around you won’t grow with you, you need to find those who will, otherwise they will pull you down…
      So is “change” worth the losses? In my experience, a resounding “Yes!”

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    2. Oops, just replied to your latest comment, thanking you for being my world, when I accidentally hit the spam button, and your comment, and mine,both disappeared. My apologies. I’m just too clumsy. ..

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